EPISODE 063: Bartender Cuddles: Derek Pete

Recording again while drinking genuine, fancy, delicious cocktails.  Because we're with Derek Pete, raised Seventh Day Adventist now atheist makes us a fantastic cocktail called The Last Word.

In this part of our time with Derek, I get to ask him questions, and he happily obliges with candid, honest and transparent answers about his upbringing, religious past, and family life.  This episode will speak and comfort so many of us that come from split families, tough upbringings, alcoholism, and much more.




This American Life
The Mental Illness Happy Hour
Stuff You Should Know
How to Do Everything
Judge John Hodgman


  • Derek asks me some questions about the inner working culture of my old mega-church.
  • We get into Derek's background, religious experience, and past.
  • Derek stopped believing when he was about 12 or 13.
  • Growing up in private school.
  • Being the kid in school that didn't have his own lunch.
  • His family and sister still being religious.
  • Jimmy Swaggart and Shreveport Louisianna.
  • Our adult relationships with our parents.
  • Dating only people from your religion.
  • The church as a dating service.
  • Humanism over religion.
  • The difference between the people in a bar and the people in a church.
  • Mom's dating on Tinder?
  • Family kidney problems and the fear of disease.
  • Fear-based religion.
  • Using religion as a cudgel, to discipline our kids with fear.
  • What to do with hell?
  • Zac's affection with Russel Brand.
  • Clearing the pressure of having any transforming agenda from relationships.
  • Missing out on life because of religious limitations.
  • Fuck Winning? What are we, Charlie Sheen over here?
  • Joining a cuddle club, but fearing the half chub, boner.
  • Leaving relationships and the emotional journey it means embracing.
  • Learning to thrive in uncertainty.
  • The people in our lives that help us realize how far we've come and how much we've grown.
  • Bartender Cuddle Party?
  • Losing loved ones.
  • Inheritance rips a family apart.
  • We all have dysfunctional upbringings.
  • Raised in abusive family units.
  • When you come across safe people, hold on to them.